Sunday, July 06, 2008
Make More Pretty Little Mistakes - I Dare You
Passionate Theme of the Day: Pretty Little Mistakes
“A man’s errors are his portals of discovery.” ~James Joyce
“Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.” ~Albert Einstein
“I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones.”~ John Peel
Mistakes. That’s the PMP topic of choice today. What the hell is a mistake anyway? A quick Google search finds this little ditty of a definition: “A wrong action attributable to bad judgment or ignorance or inattention”.
Have you ever used bad judgment or been ignorant or not been paying close enough attention? I know I have. So why all the hang up about making mistakes? Our western culture gets so hung up about not making mistakes. Being “perfect” (whatever that is) has become another addiction. Another source of anxiety and stress. The latest form of self-abuse.
What if we stopped worrying so much about making mistakes and just started living more dangerously? Not like stupid dangerous. I’m not taking about stepping out in front of moving vehicles dangerous. Not recommending running with scissors in a daycare or anything. I simply mean lightening up and taking some risks.
Today’s post was inspired by this video interview on Borders.com. Author Heather McElhatton wrote a “do over book for adults” called Pretty Little Mistakes. (I haven’t actually read the book yet, but now it’s on my list.) Remember those books when we were kids that had multiple endings? It’s like that.
Apparently McElhatton took six years off to write her great American novel and it was a total flop. She didn’t date, quit her full-time job, moved back in with her mom and spent all her free time writing. Six years later, somewhere near the age of 30, she shopped it around and didn’t get a single nibble. No takers. Zip. Zero. Nada. Big fat goose egg.
What was the prize inside that six year “mistake”? Acording to her, she hauled ass up to the attic (after she hauled her ass out of the puddle of tears on the bathroom floor) and found a linoleum remnant. She grabbed a couple of sharpie markers and used her makeshift whiteboard to mind-map/time-line her life all the way back to high school. That was the last time she remembered feeling like she knew where she was at (you folks from STL know how we love to end sentences with prepositions...it’s in my blood people). Where she remembered thinking, “OK...I’m finished with school. Now I can either…go to college or marry so and so, or blah blah blah…”.
Then she played out the different endings as if she had taken different paths. (Reminds me of the movie Sliding Doors with Gwyneth Paltrow). So she fictionalized her multiple different endings and wrote THAT book. Sure she stumbled, but she didn’t let it keep her down.
If McElhatton hadn’t made that “mistake” she never would have white boarded out the idea for the book that DID get published. The one that DID resonate with publishers. The one that landed her the interview I saw on Borders.com and the one that got her two more book deals in the works.
Mistake? Nuh-uh. It was all part of the birthing process. Maybe she needed to get that first book out of her system to create the space for the “real one” to cultivate. Sometimes we’re in such a hurry to get “there”. We often overlook the stepping stones (that often are disguised as boulders, mountains, asteroids or cosmic blockage) that are simply part of the creative process.
I had a similar conversation with my friend Katie tonight about her hopes and dreams for her future and her business (and mine too). I remember telling her that everything she desires is already there. She just needs to step into it one day at a time. (Member THAT show? That’s another post).
It’s already on the map. She’s simply not clocked enough mileage to be at that destination point yet. The cool thing is (like McElhatton’s book) is that at any point Katie (or any of us) can turn, slow down, speed up, join up with fellow travelers, stop to camp and roast some marshmallows, star gaze, bird watch, meditate, go for a hike or skinny dip in a swimming hole along the way.
These places are our choice points. Forks in the road. Bends in the path. Occasionally we hit a pothole. Or a road closed sign. Or construction. But that’s all part of the adventure. I’m excited to read McElhatton’s book and see how many different ending’s I can try on for size.
What part of your story is unfolding? And if you’re less than satisfied, what choices can you make to change it? Which fellow traveler might you be able to hitch a ride with? Do you need to slow down? Speed up? Stop and smell the roses? Are you even on the road?
If you don’t have a map and are in need of some clarification send me an e-mail, I’m happy to lend you my flashlight…it’s kind of my thing. Maybe that’s a new branding statement for me… “Have flashlight. Will travel.”
Be well happy travelers. Make mistakes. Many. Lots. Zillions. If you’re not busy living in the here and now...falling down, getting back up and dusting your butt off again and again...what are you doing? Playing it safe? Is there such a thing? Live safely dangerous. It’s the only way to fly.
Peace, passion and one for the road,
Kam