Today was my mom’s birthday. I LOOOOVE my mom. I’m not sure she’s ever read my blog. It doesn’t matter though. She’s been my biggest fan since way back when (I guess since birth really), so I don’t feel bad that she’s not into the whole blogosphere thing. What I love most about my mom is that she is just so her. She’s a beautiful, unique, and charismatic lady and she doesn’t take crap from anyone.

My niece Alyssa absolutely adores her! My mom doesn’t go by “grandma”. Her name is Lois, but Miss A calls her, “Lola”. So yes, my mom is affectionately nick-named after a showgirl. And she’s got just enough quirk to carry it off. All I can really say about today is that I am grateful that she is alive and well and that I get the opportunity to see her at least once a week.

This past week several friends have had family members pass away. Actually it’s been 3 this week. And the president of the university I work for passed last week. With all the death and dying stuff floating around, and all the busy-ness that the first few weeks of the semester bring with them, I’ve been a little funk-tified. I’m trying to breath through it all and just go with the natural ebb and flow of life. I keep telling myself that this too shall pass (as it always does) and that if I let my higher self guide me, I’ll coast along my path a little easier.

I also recently took a BIG leap in the vulnerability category. I’ve been getting some “taps” on the shoulder regarding a certain person who has been in my life for a very long time. I decided not to over analyze the situation and just put out there whatever it was that was coming up for me. I sent an e-mail and to my surprise the universe devised a plan within 48 hours that had this person on my doorstep (exactly as I’d asked). Manifestation in action! Honestly, I’m ALL about sweet synchronicities, but this one still has me scratchin’ my head. (Really, I hadn’t seen this person in nearly a year and POOF, just by asking there he was).

I can’t say what will come of those 4-hour long conversations that were shared over the course of about 24-48 hours, only time will tell. But I trusted my intuition and let spirit guide me. I kept hearing the word “send” after I wrote my e-mail and I decided to listen. The universe responded (fast!). I’m reminded of a quote by Gilda Radner…

“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity.”

I couldn’t have said it any better myself. I’ll try and remember that when I get itchy for answers. When I get a case of the “but now whats?” I’ll have to use those two words as my triggers to release any and all attachment to the HOW of the outcome. I know what my heart desires. I’ve stated my intention. Now I just have to focus on the feeling of what it is I desire. And LET GO of trying to control it’s ultimate unfolding.

Trust is a scary, beautiful and magical thing. Learning to trust myself, my heart and those that I open my heart to is quite a stretch. Taking action feels good. I’m happy that I took my leap and supportive of my deliciously ambiguous friend as he takes his.

How are you stretching your trust muscles today?

xo,
kam